TEN ESSENTIAL COMEDIES

TEN ESSENTIAL COMEDIES FOR MOVING INTERSTATE

By Jase Shepherd

Before my recent move to Melbourne from the Gold Coast, I decided pretty quickly that I was going to pack light. I allowed myself the one-suitcase limit, exactly thirty kilos, to move my entire life interstate. Twenty-eight kilos would consist of warm clothing, shoes and a few basic toiletries like toothpaste and body butter. The remaining two kilograms would be allocated to ten DVDs from my 200+ collection. This selection process would prove to be the most difficult experience of my life thus far.

Row upon row upon row (there were three rows), I analysed each DVD and considered their merits for inclusion in my top ten. Schindler’s List? Hmm, too depressing. Fight Club? Ugh, too bleak. Pride and Prejudice? I swear, not mine. It was quickly becoming apparent that I only wanted to take the more upbeat movies along with me. You know, light, popcorn entertainment that would make me feel good during those inevitable moments of homesickness. Turns out ‘upbeat’ was still a little too broad, so to save myself time, I refined my search down to my favourite film genre – comedy. Perfect, this will be easy, I thought. Ah, no. Turns out almost half of my DVDs were comedies. True classics like Anchorman and Groundhog Day peppered with the banal crap that we all have a soft spot for. Rob Schneider films, anyone? How was I going to narrow this down even further? Ten movies?! I needed some rules, rules that would ensure I picked only the most beloved comedies of my generation (Y). Rules that would force me to choose films based on pure entertainment rather than critical acclaim. So, I came up with very specific selection criteria and set about creating a list I call the ‘Ten Essential Comedies for Moving Interstate’.

Rule #1: You can only select comedies or films with heavy traces of comedy. Everything else stays on the shelf next to Precious.

Rule #2: You must have viewed each film more than 10 times in its entirety, so as to ensure its repeat-viewing quality. Basically, this means that if nine of your DVDs were to crack in half and only one DVD remained, you still wouldn’t be stumped for variety.

Rule #3: Each film selected must have a different marquee actor. This means you can only select one Will Ferrell film, not five or six (obviously an easy thing to do). To further clarify, a marquee actor is somebody who has his or her name and face on the front of the DVD case.

Rule #4: AKA The ‘Jim Belushi’ Rule. One spot must be reserved for a TV comedy series. And that series cannot be According to Jim. Not under any circumstances.

Rule #5: All decisions are final. You live by the disc, die by the disc. So, if you were thinking of selecting Grandma’s Boy, don’t.

Through a process of elimination and after consulting with various members of my brotherhood, I whittled my preliminary list down to around twenty films. Then fifteen. Then ten. It pains me to say that I had room for not one Bill Murray film, despite the guy having arguably the greatest body of comedic work over the past 30 years. Rule #5: All decisions are final. I zipped up my suitcase and left for the airport. I’ll never pack light again.

In no particular order, here are the ten DVDs I selected:

BORAT (2006) starring Sacha Baron Cohen

THE OFFENSIVE COMEDY

I said in no particular order, but Borat takes the #1 spot. Hands down. It’s a movie I have watched close to 15 times (if I had to guess) and one that I still quote on a daily basis. Yes, the world needs to stop quoting Borat. But only if it means people will stop quoting Super Troopers. “I don't want a large farva. I want a goddamn litre o' cola!” C’mon guys, enough already. Bottom line is, I have never laughed as hard as I did the first time I saw Borat on the big screen. This film is offensive. The moment where the Kazakhi reporter brings a plastic bag of his own crap to a family dinner table; that’s when I knew I was watching something truly special. Take this DVD with you interstate and show your new friends how ‘edgy’ you are.

DUMB & DUMBER (1994) starring Jim Carrey & Jeff Daniels

THE BUDDY COMEDY

As per Rule #3, I knew that selecting just one Jim Carrey film was going to be extremely tough. I’m sure most people would agree that it’s a race between this and the first Ace Ventura. Both hilarious films, but it’s the evil side of Carrey’s Lloyd Christmas that seals Dumb & Dumber for me. That crazy, possessed laughter as he’s riding away on his moped after dosing Daniels with turbo-lax will haunt your dreams. It’s also funny as hell. This movie is the perfect buddy comedy for a brainless night on the couch in your new Victorian terrace abode.

CITY SLICKERS (1991) starring Billy Crystal

THE SENTIMENTAL COMEDY

Obviously a great comedy, but the more I watch this film the less I laugh. Then why select it in my top ten you ask? Well, it’s probably because City Slickers really hits home with me and a lot of other guys I know too. It’s the story of three men, all in a rut, who rediscover their inner child by playing cowboys in the Wild West. I mean, c’mon, who didn’t want to be a cowboy when they were growing up? I still want to be Clint Eastwood and he’s eighty-one years old. This is one of those rare comedy gems that tap into true male emotion while bringing the laughs at the same time. It has all the big comedic set pieces for a Hollywood formula, but it’s also a very tender and well-written story. You probably won’t find a more uplifting music score in a feature comedy. I still choke up when Crystal and his buddies finally reach the Colorado ranch with their herd still in tact. If you’re missing your mates back home, whack on City Slickers and reminisce about all those great times you had.

STEP BROTHERS (2008) starring Will Ferrell & John C. Reilly

THE ‘FERRELL’ COMEDY

Okay, this one was tricky. I had to decide between two Will Ferrell films: Anchorman being the obvious choice or this, Step Brothers. I concede that Anchorman is an all-time comedy classic, but man, Step Brothers just makes me laugh so much harder. It’s just so... stupid. This was the movie that made me realise why Will Ferrell is so hilarious to watch on screen. It’s his eyes. There’s just something not right about those cold, lifeless eyes. They make him seem almost cartoonish, allowing us to suspend our beliefs and accept the absurd possibilities of his world. You might not hear this film being quoted as much as Burgundy’s zingers, but the improv is so loose that the one-liners come harder and faster. Seriously, imagine those two guys were your sons? If you’re not getting along with your new roommate, suggest watching Step Brothers and you might find something in common.

BACK TO THE FUTURE: PART II (1989) starring Michael J. Fox & Christopher Lloyd

THE ADVENTURE COMEDY

The original Back to the Future is not the best film in the trilogy. Nope. That prize goes to Part II: The Hoverboard. I don’t care what the ‘critics’ and ‘scholars’ say, Part II is tons more fun with better visual effects and more memorable characters. Remember the first time you saw McFly take a look around 2015? You’d never seen anything like it! You wanted to be there, at the Café 80s, “where it's always morning in America, even in the afternoo-noo-noon.” All I know is that growing up, this was the only film in the trilogy that was regularly aired on free-to-air TV, and the reason for this is because it’s the most entertaining. The way the writers were able to weave the new plot with the original story was a work of genius. Pack this DVD in your suitcase, or don’t. It’ll probably be on TV next Friday.

HAPPY GILMORE (1996) starring Adam Sandler

THE SPORTS COMEDY

What happened to Sandler? Where did it all go wrong? I don’t care. I’ll just be forever thankful for his two greatest films, Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore. But I had to make a choice and Gilmore is it. Sandler’s golf comedy hits all the right beats, has clear character goals and plenty at stake. ‘A hockey player with severe anger issues is forced to join the golf tour, a sport he detests, in order to save his Grandmother’s home.’ Brilliant. I would go and see this kind of film any day of the week, but it probably wouldn’t be half as good. Add it to your suitcase. Everyone needs at least one sports film in their comedy arsenal.

ZOOLANDER (2001) starring Ben Stiller

THE SATIRICAL COMEDY

Der-ek Zoo-land-er! In my opinion, only three comedy sketches have been successfully adapted into feature films. This is one of them (the other two are Wayne’s World and Borat). Here is a character so naïve that you can’t help but fall in love with him. It’s hard to believe that this film was released over ten years ago. With the Kardashian juggernaut now at full steam, I feel like Zoolander, in its satire on the fashion industry and modern celebrity culture, is more relevant than ever. It’s not biting or particularly mean in its mockery of male models, it’s really just Ben Stiller and his pals dressing up and having a bit of harmless fun. This is the kind of light entertainment I was talking about. I know that Zoolander is stupid. It’s a ridiculously stupid film. But everyone has seen it, everyone owns it and everyone loves it. Trust me, this belongs in your suitcase. Your styling gel doesn’t.

NATIONAL LAMPOON’S VACATION (1983) starring Chevy Chase

THE ROAD TRIP COMEDY

Yeah, it was released before a lot of us were even born. But you can’t tell me that you didn’t watch this movie with your family over, and over, and over again. It was constantly on free-to-air growing up and it was always funny. Is there a better moment in this film than when Chevy Chase’s Clark Griswold tells his family, his own flesh and blood, that they’re all “fucked in the head”? There’s just something innately funny about watching a character as he’s driven to breaking point. Like all great road comedies, it’s the journey, not the destination that’s important. The journey here is more a series of humorous family scenarios than life changing events, but that sits fine with me. Hey, it’s a comedy! Throw the formula out the door. I’m not convinced that Clark has changed one iota by the end of this film, and I love that. It’s real. So, you’re moving interstate? Why not load the family truckster and drive cross-country Griswold-style.

WEDDING CRASHERS (2005) starring Owen Wilson & Vince Vaughn

THE ROMANTIC COMEDY

What?! Romantic comedy? Hell yes, it’s just done from a guy’s point of view. Besides, chicks love this film. Wedding Crashers is Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson at their finest. It’s one of those movies that you can’t help but sit down and watch, even when you pick it up half way through. The thin premise (two guys crash weddings and try to get laid) stretches surprisingly far and there are plenty of memorable lines to add to your repertoire. The hardest laughs come from the frequent Vaughn/Wilson banter, Will Ferrell’s cameo as Vaughn’s creepy ‘funeral-crashing’ mentor and the sequence where Wilson is forced to crash weddings by himself. “Love doesn't exist, that's what I'm trying to tell you guys. And I'm not picking on love, 'cause I don't think friendship exists either.” Include this DVD in your top ten and I can guarantee you’ll have plenty of friends coming round. Maybe even female ones.

THE OFFICE (U.S. TV Series 2005-) starring Steve Carell

THE CRINGE COMEDY

You know, the U.K. version of The Office is better than the U.S. version, blah, blah, blah. I’ve heard it all before. I’ve watched both, I love both, and I give big props to the original. Ricky Gervais crafted an amazing piece of comedy, but he didn’t exactly create the mockumentary format. Christopher Guest (This is Spinal Tap, Best in Show) had been doing the same thing for many years prior. Remember also that the U.K. version consists of only fourteen episodes. The U.S. version, believe it or not, is now up to one hundred and sixty episodes and counting. To maintain that level of sidesplitting comedy for so long is frankly remarkable. This is still Steve Carell’s best work, despite having established himself as a film star many moons ago. It could have been so easy for his character to become a carbon copy of Gervais’ David Brent. But thankfully for us comedy fans, Carell and the show’s creators fashioned something different, something I genuinely think is a whole lot funnier. Toss this one in your suitcase. Watching the same familiar Office faces night in night out will make you feel right at home.